One Night Only

one-night only, we won't really know
whether it's going to fade away as the sun rises
or leave traces in your body and soul
the feeling of being desired can push someone to plunge
into a deadly game of passion and forbidden romance

one-night only,so impetuous, so heedless
despises the word tomorrow just to satisfy the thirst of the flesh
does not worry being with someone who'll leave as darkness disappears
all being wanted was to soar anywhere like a bird
or empty the bottle of ecstatic serum to its last drop


one-night only, so arousing and yet frustrating
for someone who easily falls without even thinking
for someone with a heart as soft as a feather
for love can melt anyone's heart
even of a dark king's who isn't fit to be loved

The Man Who Broke My Heart Three Times

I had known a man
whom I thought was the one for me
Then he left just like others
but one day he came back
my heart was filled with glee...


I tried so hard to be somebody
who will not trip on his ego
and make him lose his temper
Did everything ti make him stay
but alas! He still went away again...


He left without a word
left me in limbo
made me abandon my faith
I felt so alone and numb that time
still hoped that he'll be back in my arms...


Prayers were answered.. he came back
this time full of regrets, of apologies
abundant with dreams and promises
That he'll never leave me again
that we'll be together forever...


Plans were made, anxiousness heightened
was it real? was I dreaming?
I had to pinch myself
Everything was perfect and magnificent
until one day...


He left again without a trace
this time so bitter
so cursing, so unfair
I believed in him over and over again
which made my heart keep on bleeding...


My hands are now up in the air
tears have gone dry, nothing left to say
All I know is that I now choose to be dead
and finally forget
The man who broke my heart three times...

A Loser’s Battle

I feel so battered right now. My heart is busted because I am deprived of something that helps me keep going - the chance to love him from a distance. Call me insane but it's true. That small piece of hope that fills my emptiness is taken away from me. I didn't try to put a fight because I know I'll never win. No matter how I beg, nothing's going to happen anyway for I don't have the right to complain....

My voice's never gonna be heard; my hurting's never gonna be eased. I know it's going to happen but I did not see it coming this soon. It made me disgust myself, lose my confidence, and lose faith in love. I believe I deserve this - ...be abandoned by someone who has brought out the best in me - the one who torched my unclear pilgrim.....

I'm gonna be back to my old world - the cold and barren one that gradually snatches the life out of me. Though I know this will bury a big part of me, I do not have the choice but to set him free. For I know, in doing so, his life will become perfect for I am no longer in it...

For Ram...

It never came to me
that it's possible to love unconditionally
We always think of it as a loser's way
to have someone he loves back one day...

For me it was impossible
to love someone without being loved as much in return
Every deed and affection, I expected somethin'
And if it doesn't happen, my heart is ripped out
and would feel like dying...

But then in you, I realized
with you I learned to sacrifice without putting a price
I learned to love and gave my all
a love that is pure and inevitable...

In you I've learned to accept defeat
without trying so hard to get what I deserve to reap
A paint of smile in your lips is, for me, the best reward
to wait for somethin' more from you is undeniably hard...

I love the way you make me feel
I laugh hard and become the kinkiest girl you could imagine
But when we go back to our real, separate worlds
I become a useless thing in a box so barren and cold.....

A GUY IN WHITE

I used to admire a guy in white who was so cool, innocent, saintly, and shy. He was so simple and so adorable; definitely attractive. He could even turn the girls (including me) to green, to blush, and to tumble. For me he was like MnM.. melts in mouth and not in hands.. hahaha..

Anyway, this guy in white became my friend; and we became close for we had a lot of things in common. We often met in church and religious gatherings. He assisted the priests while we were the one singing. We even went on trips together. Well obviously, those trips were all about church missions. Those times being together were the most ecstatic scenes in my starting-to-become-mature phase of life.

Funny thing was, just the sight of him made me want to attend masses 24/7, hahahaha.... I was so inspired and was really eager to church services. Every moment I saw him, my heart beat was damn loud, the adrenalin rush was too intense.. In short, I was freaking out. I realized the admiration had gone deeper.. profound.. unadulterated.. pure(???).. Yes, I've undeniably loved him deeper..

But it wasn't right because he wanted to pursue in seminary to become a priest. I was so devastated, tormented by the thought of not being able to have him. I did pray for him to change his mind although I knew he could never be mine. How I wished to make him realize that I'm also worth fighting for..

Well, this thing happened 10 years ago. Right now we're still friends although we hardly keep in touch because of his assignment. Yeah... he really became a priest. I even attended his ordination. Do I still love him? Well, I don't know.. maybe not.. But guess what? I still have goosebumps whenever we meet.. hehehehehe.....